So I have been a pretty big fan of Groupon for a while now, and although I don't usually buy things from them I always find time to look around and see what they have to offer. Recently I decided to look through the "Goods" section, when I realized that they often have very, very, very strange items. So, below are the 10 weirdest things I have found, part one.
10.) Lighted Glasses
Ever wanted to look like you dropped out of highschool to sell Molly to college kids? Do you feel the need to dress like a futuristic gang member from RoboCop? Well this is your lucky day because these appealing neon lighted glasses are on sale for $14.99! I'm not sure what is crazier, the fact that over 400 people have bought them or that they retail for $35.
Ever wanted to look like you dropped out of highschool to sell Molly to college kids? Do you feel the need to dress like a futuristic gang member from RoboCop? Well this is your lucky day because these appealing neon lighted glasses are on sale for $14.99! I'm not sure what is crazier, the fact that over 400 people have bought them or that they retail for $35.
9.) 24-Karat Gold Beauty Bar Facial Massager by Pearle
Okay, okay. Now I've never heard of a facial massager, nor do I even know what to do with it but 24-Karat Gold? Jackpot! Looking at the thing I cant even formulate a way to massage my face with it. Do i rub it on my cheeks? Does it vibrate? Who cares, its gold! No idea why I would ever need my face massaged by some strange stick. Absolutely no idea why I would need said tool to be gold... $29,99
Okay, okay. Now I've never heard of a facial massager, nor do I even know what to do with it but 24-Karat Gold? Jackpot! Looking at the thing I cant even formulate a way to massage my face with it. Do i rub it on my cheeks? Does it vibrate? Who cares, its gold! No idea why I would ever need my face massaged by some strange stick. Absolutely no idea why I would need said tool to be gold... $29,99
8.) TLC Bum Buddies Tease My Tush Silicone Plug
What a name. At least you know exactly what you're getting when you purchase this product. The "Tease My Tush" plugs come in three sizes- beginner, intermediate, and advanced. The best part is when you aren't hanging out with your silicon "Bum Buddies" you can use them as pieces in Candy Land. Hot buy right now for $9.99.
What a name. At least you know exactly what you're getting when you purchase this product. The "Tease My Tush" plugs come in three sizes- beginner, intermediate, and advanced. The best part is when you aren't hanging out with your silicon "Bum Buddies" you can use them as pieces in Candy Land. Hot buy right now for $9.99.
7.) My Snoring Solution Stop Snoring: Anti-Snoring Jaw Strap
"Hey guys, how many times can we use the word 'snoring' in our product name?"
Serious question- is the guy in this picture dead or alive? Because honestly that "strap" looks like something from Saw that forces you to starve to death. No way in hell am I wearing that around my face.
"Hey guys, how many times can we use the word 'snoring' in our product name?"
Serious question- is the guy in this picture dead or alive? Because honestly that "strap" looks like something from Saw that forces you to starve to death. No way in hell am I wearing that around my face.
6.) Eye Buddy Vibrating Eye Massager
If there is one thing I am certain of it is that there is NO WAY an eye massage can feel good. Wanna know what sucks? When things touch your eyeballs. It took me hours when I first got contact lenses do get them into my eyes without writhing in agony. I'll pass on the cyborg mask designed to "massage" my eyeballs. $13.99
If there is one thing I am certain of it is that there is NO WAY an eye massage can feel good. Wanna know what sucks? When things touch your eyeballs. It took me hours when I first got contact lenses do get them into my eyes without writhing in agony. I'll pass on the cyborg mask designed to "massage" my eyeballs. $13.99
5.) 24-Karat Gold Playing Cards
Hey Groupon, I dont think Dan Bilzerian is browsing through your Goods section. Seriously, 24-Karat gold PLAYING CARDS? I use cards to play drunk card games, I dont need them to be solid gold. The coolest part? They have the $100 bill logo printed on the back, you know, if you are going for that real "I was born on a yacht" look. At least it will match my 24-Karat gold face massager that I use while I massage my eyes with the Eye Buddy #Luxury $8.99
Hey Groupon, I dont think Dan Bilzerian is browsing through your Goods section. Seriously, 24-Karat gold PLAYING CARDS? I use cards to play drunk card games, I dont need them to be solid gold. The coolest part? They have the $100 bill logo printed on the back, you know, if you are going for that real "I was born on a yacht" look. At least it will match my 24-Karat gold face massager that I use while I massage my eyes with the Eye Buddy #Luxury $8.99
4.) NFL Player Comfy Throws
Want to feel like your 5 years old again? Not only is this the most emasculating thing a man can wear, but at first glance it actually makes you look like a maester from GoT. Never trust a dude that owns a "throw". $12.99
Want to feel like your 5 years old again? Not only is this the most emasculating thing a man can wear, but at first glance it actually makes you look like a maester from GoT. Never trust a dude that owns a "throw". $12.99
3.) Waterproof Pet Hammock Seat Car Cover
This this is on this list for one reason. How poorly photoshopped the picture is. Seriously, I think i could recreate this in Microsoft Paint. It almost looks like something out of Blues Clues. Regardless I have no use for a hammock to be placed in my car for my dog to dangle aimlessly and get tossed around in mid air. $15.99
This this is on this list for one reason. How poorly photoshopped the picture is. Seriously, I think i could recreate this in Microsoft Paint. It almost looks like something out of Blues Clues. Regardless I have no use for a hammock to be placed in my car for my dog to dangle aimlessly and get tossed around in mid air. $15.99
2.) 3-Piece OraSmart Dental Tools Set
Are you a dentist? Probably not, but you can be! All you need is a Groupon account and $8.99 and you got yourself a starter kit! It comes with the mirror thingy, the hook thing, and the other thing that looks like the hook thing but its not. Okay on a real note if you are getting dental tools from a bargain website and not some professional distributor I am worried about your future. Who needs the dentist when you can BE the dentist!?
Are you a dentist? Probably not, but you can be! All you need is a Groupon account and $8.99 and you got yourself a starter kit! It comes with the mirror thingy, the hook thing, and the other thing that looks like the hook thing but its not. Okay on a real note if you are getting dental tools from a bargain website and not some professional distributor I am worried about your future. Who needs the dentist when you can BE the dentist!?
1.) Angry Birds Air Swimmer Turbo In Red
Interesting. A balloon that you put two double-A batteries in and fly around. Sounds like something that will last! Oh, forgot to mention that the helium or "pixie dust" (no idea what that is) required to make the "bird" fly is not included so make sure you have some extra helium tanks lying around before you spend $12.99. Apparently this retails for $50 dollars. If i ever see this in real life I'm taking my dentist set to its eyeballs. Bonus creepy family Angry Birds party video included below.
Interesting. A balloon that you put two double-A batteries in and fly around. Sounds like something that will last! Oh, forgot to mention that the helium or "pixie dust" (no idea what that is) required to make the "bird" fly is not included so make sure you have some extra helium tanks lying around before you spend $12.99. Apparently this retails for $50 dollars. If i ever see this in real life I'm taking my dentist set to its eyeballs. Bonus creepy family Angry Birds party video included below.
Did I leave one out? Comment below